Well another summer is coming to an end!
I have to be honest ......I am not crying or fighting it !!
The summer has been beautiful !! In every sense of the word.
The weather has been awesome! I don't think there has been one fun thing canceled due to yucky weather! We've had beach days, park days, bike rides, picnics ..clam cake and chowder nights....plenty of ice-cream!! Along with countless afternoons at Nana&Papa's pool!! We are officially hot-dog and hamburgered out!! I realized that the other night when I had to practically beg my family to eat them...and then had left overs for lunch!
We have had weekends away with friends. weekends away with family! A fun filled week to beautiful Indiana where we stayed with family and are already counting the days when we can return!! We visited the Creation Museum in Kentucky! Driving through states we had never traveled before...taking in the beauty of this great country!!
I have enjoyed the slower pace. The lazy mornings ....with coffee and a good book! Time to do things that schedules don't allow for. I have savored the time with my kids just being mom...not mom with an agenda!! I have loved late nights with my honey ....knowing I could sleep in !! He is a good sport cause he still had to be up at the crack of dawn!!
We have celebrated our 14th anniversary .......the birthday of our first teenager......and my 38th bday!! We are never short on excuses to party here!!
Now the fun is wrapping up..... I know hard work is ahead. Keeping everyone on schedule, keeping myself on schedule, that is truly the challenge !! Making sure that books are being read, math is getting done.......supper is getting cooked because we need to get "here" or "there". Knowing that I may be able to squeak in a lazy morning with my coffee and book........ but our meetings will be infrequent!
I know in about a month I will feel stressed and look back at summer with longing in my heart ........and the counting will begin! How many weeks till winter vacation....spring break..... a long weekend.....isn't summer vacation around the corner ?
But for now "I say bring it on!!" I am ready....my mind is back in schedule mode...and unless its on my list it ain't happening!! I get a little rigid at the beginning :-) I admit it! It's just how I adjust !! But I am breaking out the apple pie recipes ......dreaming of driving through the fall foliage.
See the truth is I really LOVE all the "seasons" of my life !! I am learning to look for all the blessings right where I am today !! Whether I am by the ocean watching my kids romp in the waves.....or helping my 13 year old master a math concept...watching the first snow.........or the anticipation of the first spring flower!
To me it all speaks of a magnificent God who created all the seasons and a time for all things in those seasons!!
My treasures
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Monday, August 2, 2010
Time is flying by !!
Well today I am officially a mother of a teenager!!
How and When did that happen ?
Its seems like yesterday my whole day consisted of changing diapers, staggering feedings, kissing boo-boo's and keeping my sanity !!
Well I am still trying to keep my sanity wholly intact! But my days have changed to say the least!! Now it consists of driving to and from "hang out" times, piano lessons, and a variety of other things ! Instead of staggering feedings I am trying to keep some food in the house, since it all disappears as fast as we buy it !! Diapers are a distant memory....we've moved on to other undergarments !! I think I may be getting a little rusty at kissing boo-boo's BUT there is still no shortage of tears to go around here!! The emotions that float around this house on any given day amazes me! We run the whole gamut with such intensity it is truly a sight to behold.
Its funny how life changes with out you even noticing! One day you are everything to this little one. You hold her hand firmly and guide her every step. Without you she could not eat or have any comfort, she depends on your love to get up with her when she is hungry or sick. And you do so gladly....its that love that keeps you going when the days are endless, and the toys are scattered wall to wall....and the diapers stink, and the dishes are sky high, and the laundry higher still!
Its that same love that wonders how you will make it through the next six years as slowly you loosen that firm grip you have had on her hand. As you watch her step slowly away on her own, making choices, facing challenges and taking chances. As you let that grip that loosen you realize that you are not her EVERYTHING anymore ! Don't get me wrong I am not ready to get demoted yet...I still expect the slot right below God and Daddy . Even still it feels different now. It amazes when I watch her from a distance how much of that little girl is gone, never to be seen again. Replaced by a young woman who is trying so hard to define herself. That is when I know I am still very much needed to reaffirm the gift that she is, the treasure that she was created to be ....who knows that better than the one who has watched her emerge from the safety of my little cocoon ......today she may have her wings but I am still keeping her close by! I still have her safe by the hand.......for a little longer.......working toward the day when she will fly.......
How and When did that happen ?
Its seems like yesterday my whole day consisted of changing diapers, staggering feedings, kissing boo-boo's and keeping my sanity !!
Well I am still trying to keep my sanity wholly intact! But my days have changed to say the least!! Now it consists of driving to and from "hang out" times, piano lessons, and a variety of other things ! Instead of staggering feedings I am trying to keep some food in the house, since it all disappears as fast as we buy it !! Diapers are a distant memory....we've moved on to other undergarments !! I think I may be getting a little rusty at kissing boo-boo's BUT there is still no shortage of tears to go around here!! The emotions that float around this house on any given day amazes me! We run the whole gamut with such intensity it is truly a sight to behold.
Its funny how life changes with out you even noticing! One day you are everything to this little one. You hold her hand firmly and guide her every step. Without you she could not eat or have any comfort, she depends on your love to get up with her when she is hungry or sick. And you do so gladly....its that love that keeps you going when the days are endless, and the toys are scattered wall to wall....and the diapers stink, and the dishes are sky high, and the laundry higher still!
Its that same love that wonders how you will make it through the next six years as slowly you loosen that firm grip you have had on her hand. As you watch her step slowly away on her own, making choices, facing challenges and taking chances. As you let that grip that loosen you realize that you are not her EVERYTHING anymore ! Don't get me wrong I am not ready to get demoted yet...I still expect the slot right below God and Daddy . Even still it feels different now. It amazes when I watch her from a distance how much of that little girl is gone, never to be seen again. Replaced by a young woman who is trying so hard to define herself. That is when I know I am still very much needed to reaffirm the gift that she is, the treasure that she was created to be ....who knows that better than the one who has watched her emerge from the safety of my little cocoon ......today she may have her wings but I am still keeping her close by! I still have her safe by the hand.......for a little longer.......working toward the day when she will fly.......
Friday, July 23, 2010
Dancing and Marriage
Its seems so many romantic songs that I like talk about dancing. There is something about dancing that moves me. Dancing on your daddy's feet as a his little princess ! Dancing in front of the mirror to your favorite tunes as a teenager. Dancing on your wedding day with your dad so bittersweet. Dancing in the dark with your babies partly to get them to sleep, partly savoring the tenderness of the moment. How I wish I had one of those nights back. Smelling that baby hair, hearing the gentle breathing and swaying in the moonlit room, while humming our favorite song. Then there is the toddler dance. You know it!! Its rained for 10 million days, you have kids with way too much energy and its only 10 in the morning. So you crank the radio and the whole house becomes your dance floor. From room to room you prance and twirl. The house erupts in giggles as your little ones watch you dance and they catch a glimpse of a "carefree" mommy, not worried about balanced diets and bedtimes, but totally wrapped up in the moment with them. Treasure those memories.
Then their is the dance of love, which the song in my previous post talks about. Remember the first dance you had with your honey. How stiff and awkward it was, not knowing which way the other would move. Too slow ...too fast ...too much sway..ouch my toe again and then start all over. Its almost painful to watch.....believe me we have never mastered the dancing thing but I have come to realize that we've been dancing this life together now for long enough that there is a gentle flow to our dance! As the song says "dancing in the minefields" That got me thinking about marriage and life, yes there are a lot of minefields out there, lots of stresses and pressure that couples face. It becomes an art to stay together with your dance partner and weave gentle to and fro as you are guided through the storms. Now some choose to sit out those dances and sadly they never get back up on the floor again.
As I swayed in my kitchen last night I thought of all this dancing, not really fearing that his big work boots would crush my little hot pink toes!! Not fearing that he would leave the dance floor never to return. Realizing that there was such a comfortable back and forth sway not even a hint of that early awkwardness. We have been at this dance for some time and yes sometimes it feels like a waltz and other times it feels like a jitter-bug but the security is knowing my dance partner is not sitting out any of the dances!
Then their is the dance of love, which the song in my previous post talks about. Remember the first dance you had with your honey. How stiff and awkward it was, not knowing which way the other would move. Too slow ...too fast ...too much sway..ouch my toe again and then start all over. Its almost painful to watch.....believe me we have never mastered the dancing thing but I have come to realize that we've been dancing this life together now for long enough that there is a gentle flow to our dance! As the song says "dancing in the minefields" That got me thinking about marriage and life, yes there are a lot of minefields out there, lots of stresses and pressure that couples face. It becomes an art to stay together with your dance partner and weave gentle to and fro as you are guided through the storms. Now some choose to sit out those dances and sadly they never get back up on the floor again.
As I swayed in my kitchen last night I thought of all this dancing, not really fearing that his big work boots would crush my little hot pink toes!! Not fearing that he would leave the dance floor never to return. Realizing that there was such a comfortable back and forth sway not even a hint of that early awkwardness. We have been at this dance for some time and yes sometimes it feels like a waltz and other times it feels like a jitter-bug but the security is knowing my dance partner is not sitting out any of the dances!
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Friday, June 18, 2010
Summer Love
I can remember standing in front of my mirror about the age of my older daughter (13) and singing away .....Summer love had me a blast lalalala ......I will spare you all the lyrics! But there was something about that song......that I just loved it was a frequent on my set list :-)
As I think about my love story now......one word comes to mind "distance" I know that isn't very romantic! There are many other words that would run a close second romance, tenderness, devotion, patience , and so on!! But distance is what comes to my mind now!
I was so bothered a few weeks ago when I saw segment on the news after the Gores announced their split after 40 years. First of all I was saddened for them and their family, to invest 40 years in a marriage and life together and just toss it to the side boggles my mind. But that isn't what truly bothered me, there was some type of "expert" ( I use that word very loosely) speaking to the fact that more and more couples are getting divorced later in life. In her words its a "trend" ! Lovely !!
Remember the term the "seven year itch" I remember after we made it 7 years thinking to myself well we are home free now !! She went onto to discuss that it use to be that if a couple made it 25 years they were in it for the long haul. To me that seems like a no brainer. But according to our new trend that is no longer the case. Couples are realizing that "they can find happiness later in life". In the second half or their life, as they have matured they are not the same person they were on their wedding day (no kidding) and now they may not be being fulfilled in their present marriage. What ever happened to the happiness of seeing your commitment to the end, fulfilling your vows, weathering the storms together, sickness and health till death do us part! Do those words ring a bell to anyone!! Almost all of us said those words in some order on the day we married !
But now we are faced with a new "trend" that sends all that out the window. For what ? oh that's right HAPPINESS !!
You know what I say to that .......its an escape hatch for a lot of selfish people! Its funny a few of us were sitting around talking about what we would do when our kids are grown and our commitments are less, not one of us said "it will be my time" or "finally I will do my own thing" We all chatted about how it will be a blessing to have more time to minister to others needs and take time to listen and not be so distracted. We would be able to mentor those who are in our shoes right now !! News flash that is true happiness !!
So that brings me back to my word DISTANCE !! When I was in 8th grade I ran cross country track, I was soooo slow but I loved being with friends. I also tell my kids all the time that they had a pizza party at the end of the season that I loved :-) But I started every race with the team and even though they always blew past me I steadily walked/ran the rest of it ....I always finished ..no short cuts ....staying on course....until I was over the finish line.
That's how I see my marriage......I am in it for the big pizza party !! Seriously, I want to make it to the end of the season with the team ( my husband and I) I want to go the distance.......it may seem easier to take a short cut, jump of course for a while or just call the race all together ! But there is something to be said for staying the course and crossing that finish line. Trends will come and trends will go........so I am going to let this one pass right on by me !
As I get ready to celebrate 14 years married .....romance is still very important to me but more important than that is knowing that our love and commitment is going the DISTANCE!! Our marriage is like a 3 legged race, sometimes we may stumble and fall but we are tied together by our hearts and we will cross that finish line together even if one is dragging the other !!
As I think about my love story now......one word comes to mind "distance" I know that isn't very romantic! There are many other words that would run a close second romance, tenderness, devotion, patience , and so on!! But distance is what comes to my mind now!
I was so bothered a few weeks ago when I saw segment on the news after the Gores announced their split after 40 years. First of all I was saddened for them and their family, to invest 40 years in a marriage and life together and just toss it to the side boggles my mind. But that isn't what truly bothered me, there was some type of "expert" ( I use that word very loosely) speaking to the fact that more and more couples are getting divorced later in life. In her words its a "trend" ! Lovely !!
Remember the term the "seven year itch" I remember after we made it 7 years thinking to myself well we are home free now !! She went onto to discuss that it use to be that if a couple made it 25 years they were in it for the long haul. To me that seems like a no brainer. But according to our new trend that is no longer the case. Couples are realizing that "they can find happiness later in life". In the second half or their life, as they have matured they are not the same person they were on their wedding day (no kidding) and now they may not be being fulfilled in their present marriage. What ever happened to the happiness of seeing your commitment to the end, fulfilling your vows, weathering the storms together, sickness and health till death do us part! Do those words ring a bell to anyone!! Almost all of us said those words in some order on the day we married !
But now we are faced with a new "trend" that sends all that out the window. For what ? oh that's right HAPPINESS !!
You know what I say to that .......its an escape hatch for a lot of selfish people! Its funny a few of us were sitting around talking about what we would do when our kids are grown and our commitments are less, not one of us said "it will be my time" or "finally I will do my own thing" We all chatted about how it will be a blessing to have more time to minister to others needs and take time to listen and not be so distracted. We would be able to mentor those who are in our shoes right now !! News flash that is true happiness !!
So that brings me back to my word DISTANCE !! When I was in 8th grade I ran cross country track, I was soooo slow but I loved being with friends. I also tell my kids all the time that they had a pizza party at the end of the season that I loved :-) But I started every race with the team and even though they always blew past me I steadily walked/ran the rest of it ....I always finished ..no short cuts ....staying on course....until I was over the finish line.
That's how I see my marriage......I am in it for the big pizza party !! Seriously, I want to make it to the end of the season with the team ( my husband and I) I want to go the distance.......it may seem easier to take a short cut, jump of course for a while or just call the race all together ! But there is something to be said for staying the course and crossing that finish line. Trends will come and trends will go........so I am going to let this one pass right on by me !
As I get ready to celebrate 14 years married .....romance is still very important to me but more important than that is knowing that our love and commitment is going the DISTANCE!! Our marriage is like a 3 legged race, sometimes we may stumble and fall but we are tied together by our hearts and we will cross that finish line together even if one is dragging the other !!
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Best Mommy Award
Nicholas informed me yesterday, as he sweetly held my hand, that I have won the best mommy award ! My first thought was well today must have been an OK day as I breathe a sigh of relief. Because most days I think I am in the running only for the grumpy mom award! As I bask in the delight of the moment and he gently swings my arm back in forth, he quickly informs me that if God had a wife she would probably win best mom! Of course I had a good chuckle on that one. He reminded me that he did not think God was getting married so I would be able to stay the best mommy.
Sweet little encounters like that with my toothless 8 year old are the highlight of being a mom. I am realizing I have fewer and fewer of those moments left. Nick lost his first front tooth 2 days ago. I love that toothless smile! Its some type of a marking to me in their journey from my baby to being their own big kid. I have so far tucked 7 front teeth under pillows ! It struck me that I only have 1 more front tooth to go in my mommy journey. First it was everyone off bottles, then no more diapers, and how I rejoiced when they all slept through the night. One day I realized I did not have to pack a bag every time I went out of the house. Everyone gets in and out of the car all by themselves, most of the time truth be told they are waiting for me now.
Its really amazing how fast time goes by. I know we all say it a million times, and as moms we hear it from the veteran moms all the time. Cherish this time !! But how do you do that ? In the hustle and bustle of each day ?
Truthfully I don't know. I have given it a lot of thought lately. Am I spending more time maintaining and organizing the ones who live with me, than nurturing and loving them? Is it more important to me that my house is tidy (not if you looked at it today)and my kids are meeting a certain standard, or do my children get the best part of me ? Do they get to see and feel my heart ? Do they feel like they are at the top of my to do list ? I guess if I got up enough guts I would ask them. But truthfully I am still basking in holding the "best mommy award" for today. Knowing deep down inside I am not worthy of that title. Grateful that I have today to cherish my treasures !!
Sweet little encounters like that with my toothless 8 year old are the highlight of being a mom. I am realizing I have fewer and fewer of those moments left. Nick lost his first front tooth 2 days ago. I love that toothless smile! Its some type of a marking to me in their journey from my baby to being their own big kid. I have so far tucked 7 front teeth under pillows ! It struck me that I only have 1 more front tooth to go in my mommy journey. First it was everyone off bottles, then no more diapers, and how I rejoiced when they all slept through the night. One day I realized I did not have to pack a bag every time I went out of the house. Everyone gets in and out of the car all by themselves, most of the time truth be told they are waiting for me now.
Its really amazing how fast time goes by. I know we all say it a million times, and as moms we hear it from the veteran moms all the time. Cherish this time !! But how do you do that ? In the hustle and bustle of each day ?
Truthfully I don't know. I have given it a lot of thought lately. Am I spending more time maintaining and organizing the ones who live with me, than nurturing and loving them? Is it more important to me that my house is tidy (not if you looked at it today)and my kids are meeting a certain standard, or do my children get the best part of me ? Do they get to see and feel my heart ? Do they feel like they are at the top of my to do list ? I guess if I got up enough guts I would ask them. But truthfully I am still basking in holding the "best mommy award" for today. Knowing deep down inside I am not worthy of that title. Grateful that I have today to cherish my treasures !!
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Day 1
To write or not to write ? that is the question before me.......so much swirling inside of my brain, so much bubbling inside my heart !! Is it just for me ? Probably ....... there is no easier way to get it all straight in my mind than to get it down on paper (so to speak) Its crystal clear when I can see the words before me!
So here it is ....maybe its therapy for me ! Maybe it will touch my kids at times, as they read of how much their mom cherishes this season she has with them !!
Maybe a handful of friends will read along once in awhile and get a good chuckle or shed a tear with me. Fellow travelers on the road called motherhood......could the road be more blurred ? Its comforting to know that we are not plodding along alone.
So here it is Day 1 ...no catchy title.....really no idea where it will go...maybe there won't be a
Day 2.............just a desire to write.......to see it in black & white before my eyes (and yours)
So here it is ....maybe its therapy for me ! Maybe it will touch my kids at times, as they read of how much their mom cherishes this season she has with them !!
Maybe a handful of friends will read along once in awhile and get a good chuckle or shed a tear with me. Fellow travelers on the road called motherhood......could the road be more blurred ? Its comforting to know that we are not plodding along alone.
So here it is Day 1 ...no catchy title.....really no idea where it will go...maybe there won't be a
Day 2.............just a desire to write.......to see it in black & white before my eyes (and yours)
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